Dear Gym Guy…….

In my late 40’s, I joined a gym.

…………… but I didn’t stay.

The problem?  …………The trainer was bias.

He was a young guy, nice enough and all that.  But I noticed he listed me as obese.  Now I know I’m not skinny – I’m 5’0″ and weight 150 pounds.  I’ve struggled with my weight for years.  I guess you’d call me a solid or sturdy gal. Maybe I’ll transcend, maybe I won’t. But it’s me. I am involved with many activities, dance and hike, I’m attractive enough for me.  Even if I were “obese” (and by the way f*#k off), the use of the word “obese” is so demeaning it does nothing to help a person get motivated.  To me, it was abuse.

Then he said “You are having trouble with that, it must be the start of arthritis.”  Tears welled up in my eyes at the attack to my sense of well being.  How dare he pronounce such a thing?!  I told him that suggestions like that can actually cause unsuspecting people to then get arthritis when it wasn’t really there.  I told him I had no intention of getting arthritis.

I’ve since learned that drinking water alleviates joint pain, headaches and all manner of symptoms and health problems.  It can alleviate doctor visits and unnecessary drugs too. The pain I had in my joints disappeared.

Since we’re talking unacceptable diagnoses, let me tell you about a doctor’s visit. I’d had a very long term chronic chest cold so was given a prescription for a chest x-ray. The minute she handed that x-ray prescription to me I had a “mystical” experience. I knew if I got that x-ray I’d be drawn into the medical conglomerate and eventually die.

I know that sounds crazy and dramatic and I don’t want to discourage people from going to doctors when they need to.  I would still go to a doctor if necessary.

But I never got that x-ray.

I had a knowing and that’s what I want to encourage us all to recognize – our knowing.

Later an energy healer who knew nothing about the chest cold touched my chest and said “This is dangerous energy here.”

The work I did with him set me on the path to saving my own life.

I realized I needed to work a lot harder at clearing up the baggage about my recent divorce.  I took that on and haven’t stopped.
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That was over 10 years ago.

So what I’m saying is this: don’t listen to negative pronouncements about who you are or what’s  possible for you. Even “experts” can be wrong.  Deep down you know.

My divorce brought up all manner of issues about my childhood wounds, my worth, my over eating, my over drinking, my avoidance. In essence it was the greatest gift for my awakening.

Life will whack you in the body and give you unpleasant circumstances in order to wake you up.

Unfortunately, most people cover their pain with alcohol, food, projection, hate and illness. They give up their knowing and turn their power over to a doctor.

Doctors have their place – as a partner.  I’m not denying that.

But look deeper.  What is this illness telling you?  You are much more than a physical body.

You are Light, Love and a precious Soul.

Connection with the Soul is needed for each of us on a personal level and also collectively as a nation.

The racism, hate, and divisions we are seeing in our country are about separation from Soul.  It’s time to claim our connection with ourselves.  Life has smacked us around in order to wake us up.  We don’t have time or space to be anything but authentic. As we heal ourselves we heal the world.

By the way I’m now 59 years old. I have no health issues. I am the same weight. I do not have arthritis, and things are getting better all the time.  I continually go deep with my Soul work, personal growth and healing and am committed to love which starts with me and radiates out into the world.