Help for the Helpers

A woman I barely knew called me to ask a favor.  She told me that her adult son had died.  She said she loved the newsletters I write for our meetup group and wondered if I could help her by writing something to inform people about what happened and perhaps giving some suggestions on how people could be supportive.

Now I want to ask you how you would react to a request like that?  I’m going to venture to say that most everyone wants desperately to help others in such a devastating situation. Yet most of us really don’t know how to help and may even avoid communicating for fear of not knowing how to behave.  I’m also going to venture to say that most people who go through such a devastating thing don’t always have the courage to ask for help.  Lifting oneself up in such circumstances is quite a challenge.

That’s what made this woman such a hero. What a gift she gave to me.  I was able to help a fellow human being in a way that was easy for me and in a way she clearly wanted. I was blessed.  I thank her for reaching out and allowing me to help.

I’m not here to brag about my charitable act.  I’m here to point out what a gift it was to me to be honored for service to a person who is faced with something I think would be the worst life event to befall anyone.  
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We are so often rendered helpless by watching horror stories on the news.  It makes us feel like victims of life. We want to help.  When we can make a difference, our humanity rises.To be fully human, we crave the experience of helping others and to receive help.

So here is a suggestion: when you are saddened by someone’s loss and can find no way to help them directly, perform an act of kindness for someone else.  And when you need help, reach out and ask for it. It is often a gift for others to be able to help you.  

The Part 3 section of the newsletter is open to be used for this – you are welcome to offer help, suggest a barter, or ask for help there.